Today our big sister of the house went to be with her forever family. It's been over a year since she was brought up to our house and climbed into my heart forever. It was her little life that has helped me see more clearly what motherhood looks and feels like. Our big girl was like my little mirror... pointing out all my good, bad, ugly and funny parts on a daily basis. It was her growing up that helped me grow in patience, joy, love and trust.
One of the most productive parts of this hopeful adventure has been the way God has used these little people to develop within my heart a deeper sense of and trust in the sovereignty of our good and great God. His ways are always better. His love can always be trusted. He will never fail or forget. It is His heart that will always know and love these little babies best. I am thankful for opportunities to trust Him deeper. I am more than ever so exited for the day when I will get to be in relationship with these precious souls again; worshiping our Creator, enjoying Him and each other for all of eternity.
I will miss our girl's sweet little voice calling out "Nicolie" about a 100 times a day. I will miss her adorable idiosyncrasies like her daily complements on my hair and shoes, her daily delight of carrying my morning coffee mug to the kitchen sink, the way she spent her days in constant pretend play, her play-by-play reports of what the all of the Aunties were doing and her general desire to be right by my side for as much of the day as she could manage.
I was able to experience so many "new mommy-isms" alongside her: potty training, middle of the pharmacy temper tantrums, first day of preschool joy and timeouts galore. It has been so fun to watch you settle into our home and bloom into the happy, content, mindful and clever girl you've become.
Our big sister danced her way into the hearts of our Refliwe family... a favorite at her preschool and a loving big sister to all the smaller babies in our home. I know her forever family already love her and I have no doubt that she will cherished and adored in their hearts and home just like she was in ours! I am thankful to the Father and His ability to help me feel held in His love during this difficult goodbye.
I am grateful for the time I got to borrow you, my girl. I am so thankful that God saw fit to bring you into my life. You've taught me so much and I will love you always.
Praying for you today, sweetheart...
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